Sunday 31st of March
A couple of days to make up for today having not posted yesterday. I didn't bother on Saturday because I simply didn't do anything worth writing about. Just bits and pieces all during the day then out for a meal at the Thai restaurant in Evesham in the evening. I don't think I have been there for 10 years or so. Very good food.
This morning I went for a second run outside and already have a new PB for 2.75 miles, knocking 30 seconds off the previous one at 25 and a half minutes. Felt just as hard as the first ( not surprising really ), still had to walk a bit but not as much as before. I think I will have to do a few really short runs, only a mile or so to keep the legs turning over more regularly.
Went out for lunch at Mandy's dad's today which was nice. We won't have a main meal at home for three days as we are out tomorrow as well.
There is activity on the hair front. No change on top but the beard is starting to show signs. I am having to shave every 3 days or so. It's only a light stubble but it is definitely there. However the eyebrows are going very thin. I think it is just natural loss but with nothing replacing it there is not much left.
I don't know if I will be able to post tomorrow as we are away and I haven't looked to see if we have Wi-Fi or not.
Cheers
Tim
Sunday 31 March 2013
Friday 29 March 2013
Friday 29th March
Life as a 44 year old ended well last night. We won our final league skittles match of the season by just one pin and I had our top score, which hopefully means I have won the trophy for the best away average in the league this year. I shall have to wait a while for it to be confirmed though.
Life as a 45 year old did not start so well as I am stuffed up and feeling not so good. Thanks due to Mandy and Ben for handing that one on.
We did go out for a walk this morning, and for once I was not on my own. We walked more or less the course of the festive five in Fladbury. It was not as cold as I expected. My legs do still ache a bit from that first run though which is a bit worrying. I will have to wait to see how this cold pans out before I decide on doing another. Or perhaps I should just go for it regardless!
Apart from that it has been a quite day, even managed a sleep this afternoon. I will have to be a bit more active tomorrow. Perhaps that could become my motto!
Cheers
Tim
Life as a 44 year old ended well last night. We won our final league skittles match of the season by just one pin and I had our top score, which hopefully means I have won the trophy for the best away average in the league this year. I shall have to wait a while for it to be confirmed though.
Life as a 45 year old did not start so well as I am stuffed up and feeling not so good. Thanks due to Mandy and Ben for handing that one on.
We did go out for a walk this morning, and for once I was not on my own. We walked more or less the course of the festive five in Fladbury. It was not as cold as I expected. My legs do still ache a bit from that first run though which is a bit worrying. I will have to wait to see how this cold pans out before I decide on doing another. Or perhaps I should just go for it regardless!
Apart from that it has been a quite day, even managed a sleep this afternoon. I will have to be a bit more active tomorrow. Perhaps that could become my motto!
Cheers
Tim
Thursday 28 March 2013
Birthday reflections
Thursday 28th March
Today was my birthday. I have to say that I have not really celebrated this one. It seems wrong to think of the past year as anything but a nightmare that I am glad is over and done with. Perhaps I should have just celebrated it's passing.
Late last night I got a bit upset whilst thinking about the events of the past few months. I have managed to put these thoughts away in a box recently but the box got opened. It was probably down to being too tired having done too much during the day but the box got slammed shut very quickly and will stay that way for a while, probably until scan time comes round. I definitely feel like I have been robbed of about 4 months of proper living, not to mention the stealing of our holiday to New Zealand. We worked so hard during the year towards the holiday but at the end of the day it was just that, only a holiday.
We have to move forward now although until the scan and results are done we are in limbo. I continue to feel better and stronger but only time will tell. The Easter break means we can be together as a family with me being well enough to join in so we must make the most and enjoy it.
Ben has gone climbing tonight and I am off to skittles so no change to the routine to allow for such trivial things as birthdays. We are going out on Saturday night to make up for it.
I did take Mandy out to lunch today but it was a bit retro. Back when we started courting Mandy worked in Evesham and I was still at school at Prince Henry's, so at lunchtime I met her in town, bought some chips and then sat in the park where we shared her sarnys and my chips. So we took sandwiches and bought chips and sat in the car and ate them, too old for cold park benches now!
Best get off to skittles now. Cheers.
Tim
Today was my birthday. I have to say that I have not really celebrated this one. It seems wrong to think of the past year as anything but a nightmare that I am glad is over and done with. Perhaps I should have just celebrated it's passing.
Late last night I got a bit upset whilst thinking about the events of the past few months. I have managed to put these thoughts away in a box recently but the box got opened. It was probably down to being too tired having done too much during the day but the box got slammed shut very quickly and will stay that way for a while, probably until scan time comes round. I definitely feel like I have been robbed of about 4 months of proper living, not to mention the stealing of our holiday to New Zealand. We worked so hard during the year towards the holiday but at the end of the day it was just that, only a holiday.
We have to move forward now although until the scan and results are done we are in limbo. I continue to feel better and stronger but only time will tell. The Easter break means we can be together as a family with me being well enough to join in so we must make the most and enjoy it.
Ben has gone climbing tonight and I am off to skittles so no change to the routine to allow for such trivial things as birthdays. We are going out on Saturday night to make up for it.
I did take Mandy out to lunch today but it was a bit retro. Back when we started courting Mandy worked in Evesham and I was still at school at Prince Henry's, so at lunchtime I met her in town, bought some chips and then sat in the park where we shared her sarnys and my chips. So we took sandwiches and bought chips and sat in the car and ate them, too old for cold park benches now!
Best get off to skittles now. Cheers.
Tim
Wednesday 27 March 2013
Running outside at last
Wednesday 27th March
I went to work again today, it's going to get to be a habit at this rate! Getting back into the swing of being there though and enjoying it as usual. The only thing I don't like at all is the getting up early!
After a bit of a rest I managed to go out for my first road run since December the 8th last year. Managed 2.75 miles in 26 minutes. Ran the first mile then had to walk for 1 minute. I then just ran until I felt I had to walk again and carried on like that until I got home. I kept the walks down to one minute at a time, in total I walked for 5 minutes. It is a start that I can build on in the coming weeks. Can I order up some warmer weather though!
The legs don't feel great whilst running but that is hardly surprising after such a long length of inactivity. The energy levels could also remain low for quite a while as a result of the chemo. That one is a bit of an unknown, it could be a few weeks, a month or 6 months. Just depends on how my body copes with it. The main problem seems to be the lungs at the moment. Obviously they have a lot less capacity than they did before due to the lack of hard use, but it can be a side effect of the chemo as well. It can sort of crisp them up and if it has they will never get back to their previous level. It's just something I am going to have to wait and see about.
Just good to have the trainers on again. I can't say I enjoyed it as it seemed bloody hard work for such a small distance, but the thought that I could yet be up on top of the Cotswolds and Bredon Hill during the summer ( what summer? ) will keep me going.
Cheers
Tim
I went to work again today, it's going to get to be a habit at this rate! Getting back into the swing of being there though and enjoying it as usual. The only thing I don't like at all is the getting up early!
After a bit of a rest I managed to go out for my first road run since December the 8th last year. Managed 2.75 miles in 26 minutes. Ran the first mile then had to walk for 1 minute. I then just ran until I felt I had to walk again and carried on like that until I got home. I kept the walks down to one minute at a time, in total I walked for 5 minutes. It is a start that I can build on in the coming weeks. Can I order up some warmer weather though!
The legs don't feel great whilst running but that is hardly surprising after such a long length of inactivity. The energy levels could also remain low for quite a while as a result of the chemo. That one is a bit of an unknown, it could be a few weeks, a month or 6 months. Just depends on how my body copes with it. The main problem seems to be the lungs at the moment. Obviously they have a lot less capacity than they did before due to the lack of hard use, but it can be a side effect of the chemo as well. It can sort of crisp them up and if it has they will never get back to their previous level. It's just something I am going to have to wait and see about.
Just good to have the trainers on again. I can't say I enjoyed it as it seemed bloody hard work for such a small distance, but the thought that I could yet be up on top of the Cotswolds and Bredon Hill during the summer ( what summer? ) will keep me going.
Cheers
Tim
Tuesday 26 March 2013
Just work
Tuesday 26th March
Really nothing to write about today as I spent most of it at work. Went out at 8am and didn't get back in until 4 this afternoon so by far the longest day I have done. I have to admit that by 3 this afternoon I was worn out and couldn't do much more. Early night needed tonight as I am back in again tomorrow although for not as long.
Giving proper thought to the first run outside now, just need the weather to pick up. Stories of Cleevewold 14 which I ran last year have inspired me again, even though they were horror stories of snow and ice and temperatures of -8deg. Amazing English weather again, last year it was 23deg and fantastic sunshine for this race on the same weekend. Either tomorrow afternoon or Thursday morning for a run. Only 7 and a half weeks to Tewkesbury so I need to start getting a few miles under the belt.
A friend asked me if I was sensible enough to listen to my body on the day of the race and stop if it was getting too much. Yeah right. I do not have a sensible bone in my body when it comes to running races. I will finish no matter what. This illness certainly will not stop me.
Cheers for now.
Tim
Really nothing to write about today as I spent most of it at work. Went out at 8am and didn't get back in until 4 this afternoon so by far the longest day I have done. I have to admit that by 3 this afternoon I was worn out and couldn't do much more. Early night needed tonight as I am back in again tomorrow although for not as long.
Giving proper thought to the first run outside now, just need the weather to pick up. Stories of Cleevewold 14 which I ran last year have inspired me again, even though they were horror stories of snow and ice and temperatures of -8deg. Amazing English weather again, last year it was 23deg and fantastic sunshine for this race on the same weekend. Either tomorrow afternoon or Thursday morning for a run. Only 7 and a half weeks to Tewkesbury so I need to start getting a few miles under the belt.
A friend asked me if I was sensible enough to listen to my body on the day of the race and stop if it was getting too much. Yeah right. I do not have a sensible bone in my body when it comes to running races. I will finish no matter what. This illness certainly will not stop me.
Cheers for now.
Tim
Monday 25 March 2013
RUNNING !!!!!
Monday 25th March
With Ben posting yesterday I have a couple of days to fill in.
Sunday was a good day. I went to the gym in the morning. I started with 15 minutes gentle warm up on the bike followed by my first attempt at running on the treadmill. With Mandy sat not far behind me keeping a beady eye on what I was doing, and a warning not to overdo it, I started with 5 minutes walking, then 5 minutes running. I then did 2 mins walking, 3 mins running and repeated until I got to 30 minutes. A total of 4.15 kilometres covered so fairly happy with that. The legs felt OK but the lungs were burning a bit during the running. The really good news was that the legs felt absolutely fine this morning. At least I am off and running !!!!
In the afternoon I decided it would be a good idea to make sure I was OK after the gym to have a bit of a nap. I had about an hour but it actually made me feel crap for about an hour after I woke up. Fortunately a fabulous tea of belly pork with roasties and veg ( definitely 10 out of 10 for Mand on this one ).
Today was much quieter. Did some work on line towards the Evesham 10K and Macmillan fund raising, plus a little shopping. Walked for an hour or so this afternoon and have a running club meeting this evening. I needed it to be quiet as I have a long day at work tomorrow ( well long for me, early start and have to be there in the afternoon ).
Need to be off to the meeting now.
Cheers
Tim
With Ben posting yesterday I have a couple of days to fill in.
Sunday was a good day. I went to the gym in the morning. I started with 15 minutes gentle warm up on the bike followed by my first attempt at running on the treadmill. With Mandy sat not far behind me keeping a beady eye on what I was doing, and a warning not to overdo it, I started with 5 minutes walking, then 5 minutes running. I then did 2 mins walking, 3 mins running and repeated until I got to 30 minutes. A total of 4.15 kilometres covered so fairly happy with that. The legs felt OK but the lungs were burning a bit during the running. The really good news was that the legs felt absolutely fine this morning. At least I am off and running !!!!
In the afternoon I decided it would be a good idea to make sure I was OK after the gym to have a bit of a nap. I had about an hour but it actually made me feel crap for about an hour after I woke up. Fortunately a fabulous tea of belly pork with roasties and veg ( definitely 10 out of 10 for Mand on this one ).
Today was much quieter. Did some work on line towards the Evesham 10K and Macmillan fund raising, plus a little shopping. Walked for an hour or so this afternoon and have a running club meeting this evening. I needed it to be quiet as I have a long day at work tomorrow ( well long for me, early start and have to be there in the afternoon ).
Need to be off to the meeting now.
Cheers
Tim
Sunday 24 March 2013
A Different Point of View
Sunday 24th March
Well a bit of a different point of view as the Grumpy teenager is writing today. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Ben and I'm 15 years old. To most of the Running Club people that little boy who you used to see with dad, who now isn't so little!
I've been told I have been very quiet throughout this entire affair. I suppose I've felt that there isn't much I can do about it. I have kept some of my feelings a bit silent just to help Mum and Dad get through. It has been testing for all of us and especially hard because of the timing, with our trip to New Zealand being cancelled and the closeness to Christmas. But I suppose our hastily arranged trip to Wales was good for all of us as none of us would have wanted to be at home.
Routine has changed and what was abnormal has become normal. After being used to Dad being at work until quite late, I never used to see him much but that has changed. It has been hard for us to do a lot together as he's been so tired and not up to our usual games. I don't think it is bothering him too much as, with me getting older, I am now more of a match and resist him pinning me on the floor and tickling me till I can't breath! This unfortunately is definitely my Achilles' Heel as he gets total control over me with just a short tickle!
I haven't seen Dad much today as I've been at a mates house and then he was asleep until his nurse arrived so he's only just surfaced and appeared. We've got Nan (Mum's Mum) over tonight for tea which is nice. We get on really well and always have done ever since I was little, and before school when Wednesday was the day to go to Nanny's House! She lives on a farm and I really enjoy it there, I'm definitely a country boy.
A bit more about me, I go to Prince Henrys High School, that for those people who used to go there and were in Mum and Dad's year Mr Miller is still there and after teaching Dad PE (sport), teaches me 30 years on! He did once accidently call me Tim! Dad did mention the school robotics trip to the Excel arena and I admit I was a bit grumpy when I got back but not too bad, we came 26th out of 40 so that was quite good.
I seem to be just blabbering on a bit but then that's what this is for just get your feelings out onto the page (or computer screen). I suppose I'm used to just writing rubbish, English essays at school are great practice!
Thanks for reading.
Ben
Well a bit of a different point of view as the Grumpy teenager is writing today. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Ben and I'm 15 years old. To most of the Running Club people that little boy who you used to see with dad, who now isn't so little!
I've been told I have been very quiet throughout this entire affair. I suppose I've felt that there isn't much I can do about it. I have kept some of my feelings a bit silent just to help Mum and Dad get through. It has been testing for all of us and especially hard because of the timing, with our trip to New Zealand being cancelled and the closeness to Christmas. But I suppose our hastily arranged trip to Wales was good for all of us as none of us would have wanted to be at home.
Routine has changed and what was abnormal has become normal. After being used to Dad being at work until quite late, I never used to see him much but that has changed. It has been hard for us to do a lot together as he's been so tired and not up to our usual games. I don't think it is bothering him too much as, with me getting older, I am now more of a match and resist him pinning me on the floor and tickling me till I can't breath! This unfortunately is definitely my Achilles' Heel as he gets total control over me with just a short tickle!
I haven't seen Dad much today as I've been at a mates house and then he was asleep until his nurse arrived so he's only just surfaced and appeared. We've got Nan (Mum's Mum) over tonight for tea which is nice. We get on really well and always have done ever since I was little, and before school when Wednesday was the day to go to Nanny's House! She lives on a farm and I really enjoy it there, I'm definitely a country boy.
A bit more about me, I go to Prince Henrys High School, that for those people who used to go there and were in Mum and Dad's year Mr Miller is still there and after teaching Dad PE (sport), teaches me 30 years on! He did once accidently call me Tim! Dad did mention the school robotics trip to the Excel arena and I admit I was a bit grumpy when I got back but not too bad, we came 26th out of 40 so that was quite good.
I seem to be just blabbering on a bit but then that's what this is for just get your feelings out onto the page (or computer screen). I suppose I'm used to just writing rubbish, English essays at school are great practice!
Thanks for reading.
Ben
Saturday 23 March 2013
Hampton Ferry 5K
Saturday 23rd March
No I did not run the Hampton Ferry 5K. I wasn't even tempted given the miserable weather and mud under foot. Much more fun to stand at the finish line and write people's finish times down whilst you can't even feel your fingers! It's a decent little race though and raises money for Diabetes UK so it is in a good cause.
We had a meeting about our Evesham 10K race afterwards in the café accompanied by a sausage and bacon sandwich, a cup of hot chocolate and a piece of their famous ( ? ) bread pudding.
By the time we got back there was not much else to be done before the nurse arrived for my injection. This is really getting wearing now, especially as it is only to prevent any more forming and not really getting rid of the existing clots. They are supposed to clear on their own. I can't tell about the deep ones but the surface veins are still very hard, although not painful as they were at the beginning.
My sister was supposed to visit today on her way to Cornwall but is not going because of the weather. So instead of vegetarian lasagne we are having steak! Excellent swap!!
Off to eat it now actually.
Cheers
Tim
No I did not run the Hampton Ferry 5K. I wasn't even tempted given the miserable weather and mud under foot. Much more fun to stand at the finish line and write people's finish times down whilst you can't even feel your fingers! It's a decent little race though and raises money for Diabetes UK so it is in a good cause.
We had a meeting about our Evesham 10K race afterwards in the café accompanied by a sausage and bacon sandwich, a cup of hot chocolate and a piece of their famous ( ? ) bread pudding.
By the time we got back there was not much else to be done before the nurse arrived for my injection. This is really getting wearing now, especially as it is only to prevent any more forming and not really getting rid of the existing clots. They are supposed to clear on their own. I can't tell about the deep ones but the surface veins are still very hard, although not painful as they were at the beginning.
My sister was supposed to visit today on her way to Cornwall but is not going because of the weather. So instead of vegetarian lasagne we are having steak! Excellent swap!!
Off to eat it now actually.
Cheers
Tim
Friday 22 March 2013
Positivity
Friday 22nd March
Another morning at work today, that's the first time I have managed to go in 3 times in a week since I was diagnosed. That put together with the fact that I have not needed an afternoon sleep for three days means I am showing signs of improving energy levels. I still need to be careful as there is a fairly busy weekend planned.
Last night's skittles provided another boost as our win means we have won the league with a game to spare this year.
So positivity is growing again because of the above points and the increased length of walks. Although until I get a few successful runs under my belt I will not be as happy as I could be. And with the weather forecast for the weekend I may have to wait anyway ( or go to the treadmill at the gym! ).
Ben and I are doing the timing for the Hampton Ferry 5K in aid of Diabetes UK tomorrow morning. So stood outside in the cold/rain/snow/wind! Lovely.
Will post again tomorrow if I survive.
Cheers
Tim
Another morning at work today, that's the first time I have managed to go in 3 times in a week since I was diagnosed. That put together with the fact that I have not needed an afternoon sleep for three days means I am showing signs of improving energy levels. I still need to be careful as there is a fairly busy weekend planned.
Last night's skittles provided another boost as our win means we have won the league with a game to spare this year.
So positivity is growing again because of the above points and the increased length of walks. Although until I get a few successful runs under my belt I will not be as happy as I could be. And with the weather forecast for the weekend I may have to wait anyway ( or go to the treadmill at the gym! ).
Ben and I are doing the timing for the Hampton Ferry 5K in aid of Diabetes UK tomorrow morning. So stood outside in the cold/rain/snow/wind! Lovely.
Will post again tomorrow if I survive.
Cheers
Tim
Thursday 21 March 2013
Long training walk
Thursday 21st March
Had a good long walk today, 8 miles in just over 2 hours. For those of you who run I did the circuit round Red Lane and back by road. At that pace I figure I could walk Tewkesbury Half in under 3-1/2 hours. Personal worst by an hour and a half but wouldn't care. I have to admit that the thighs ache a bit though tonight!
Not much else to tell today really. Signed our lives away when we signed our new wills today. Will have to keep an eye on Mand now though, no walking near cliff edges and make sure she tastes food first!
Skittles tonight. We will win the league if we win. To be honest even if we don't win we should still win the league. I can't take too much credit as I missed about 7 games of the 22. Still nice to win it again.
Cheers
Tim
Had a good long walk today, 8 miles in just over 2 hours. For those of you who run I did the circuit round Red Lane and back by road. At that pace I figure I could walk Tewkesbury Half in under 3-1/2 hours. Personal worst by an hour and a half but wouldn't care. I have to admit that the thighs ache a bit though tonight!
Not much else to tell today really. Signed our lives away when we signed our new wills today. Will have to keep an eye on Mand now though, no walking near cliff edges and make sure she tastes food first!
Skittles tonight. We will win the league if we win. To be honest even if we don't win we should still win the league. I can't take too much credit as I missed about 7 games of the 22. Still nice to win it again.
Cheers
Tim
Wednesday 20 March 2013
Working back towards sanity
Wednesday 20th March
Had another morning at work today so I feel a bit more positive. The thing about being stuck at home not feeling like you can do anything is that you start to feel useless. Going to work really helps get over this, plus I do actually enjoy what I do and like the people I work with.
After work I didn't really do anything much, but also didn't feel I had to have a sleep. Although I do now feel pretty shattered.
So some more progress is slowly being made. As Mandy was explaining to her Aunt in New Zealand this morning, we are far enough past the chemo that the awfulness of it is starting to recede a little in the memory, and we are far enough away from the scan and results that we are not getting wound up about that either.
Tomorrow is another day.
Cheers
Tim
Had another morning at work today so I feel a bit more positive. The thing about being stuck at home not feeling like you can do anything is that you start to feel useless. Going to work really helps get over this, plus I do actually enjoy what I do and like the people I work with.
After work I didn't really do anything much, but also didn't feel I had to have a sleep. Although I do now feel pretty shattered.
So some more progress is slowly being made. As Mandy was explaining to her Aunt in New Zealand this morning, we are far enough past the chemo that the awfulness of it is starting to recede a little in the memory, and we are far enough away from the scan and results that we are not getting wound up about that either.
Tomorrow is another day.
Cheers
Tim
Tuesday 19 March 2013
A bit fed up
Tuesday 19th March
A mixed day today. I felt OK physically but had a bad day in my head.
I did the longest walk I have done since being ill, 6.7 miles out to Badsey and back. Felt fine and not too tired and no sore muscles. On the other hand I found it very depressing that I could have run it before in about 45 minutes, now it takes me just under 2 hours to walk. I know I should be glad that I can do it at all at this point but I just can't see it that way. I just want to get back running. It somehow has become the thing that I need to do more than anything else to make me feel like I am getting back towards normal ( if I was ever normal! ). Tewkesbury Half seems like a million miles at the moment, I've even half considered not doing it. This will pass I'm sure once I can start to run even a little distance.
The rest of the day passed doing nothing as usual which I am also getting fed up with. The afternoon sleep is very nice in some ways but I will be happier when it is not needed any more.
I cooked tea as Mandy teaches on a Tuesday night. Not much choice as I only cook a couple of things, so chilli it was.
Work tomorrow so I will probably feel much more positive. Lets hope so.
Cheers
Tim
A mixed day today. I felt OK physically but had a bad day in my head.
I did the longest walk I have done since being ill, 6.7 miles out to Badsey and back. Felt fine and not too tired and no sore muscles. On the other hand I found it very depressing that I could have run it before in about 45 minutes, now it takes me just under 2 hours to walk. I know I should be glad that I can do it at all at this point but I just can't see it that way. I just want to get back running. It somehow has become the thing that I need to do more than anything else to make me feel like I am getting back towards normal ( if I was ever normal! ). Tewkesbury Half seems like a million miles at the moment, I've even half considered not doing it. This will pass I'm sure once I can start to run even a little distance.
The rest of the day passed doing nothing as usual which I am also getting fed up with. The afternoon sleep is very nice in some ways but I will be happier when it is not needed any more.
I cooked tea as Mandy teaches on a Tuesday night. Not much choice as I only cook a couple of things, so chilli it was.
Work tomorrow so I will probably feel much more positive. Lets hope so.
Cheers
Tim
Monday 18 March 2013
Preaching
Monday 18th March
Not much to say about today. Work, sleep, injection, tea, sleep. So I am going to preach instead.
Yet again this weekend I heard another story of someone who ignored a health problem until now it is a much bigger problem than it needed to be. So once again ( I have written this before ) I plead for all of you to take heed of the following advice.
In terms of my particular illness, if you find any kind of lump then do not wait. Get down to your doctor straight away and find out from an expert if it is a problem or not. What have you got to lose? If it is nothing then you have nothing to worry about. If it turns out to be something more, and I sincerely hope it happens to none of you, at least you will have found it early and have the best possible chance of a complete recovery.
Now I appreciate more than most that a lump may be in an intimate place, you don't get more intimate than where mine is ( was!! ), but just suck it up and go. Doctors have seen it all before, hell plenty of them have seen mine.
If I had waited much longer then I would have been in a lot more trouble. I try not to think about what would have happened if we had gone to New Zealand as planned.
All joking aside please take this advice, it might just save your life.
Not much to say about today. Work, sleep, injection, tea, sleep. So I am going to preach instead.
Yet again this weekend I heard another story of someone who ignored a health problem until now it is a much bigger problem than it needed to be. So once again ( I have written this before ) I plead for all of you to take heed of the following advice.
In terms of my particular illness, if you find any kind of lump then do not wait. Get down to your doctor straight away and find out from an expert if it is a problem or not. What have you got to lose? If it is nothing then you have nothing to worry about. If it turns out to be something more, and I sincerely hope it happens to none of you, at least you will have found it early and have the best possible chance of a complete recovery.
Now I appreciate more than most that a lump may be in an intimate place, you don't get more intimate than where mine is ( was!! ), but just suck it up and go. Doctors have seen it all before, hell plenty of them have seen mine.
If I had waited much longer then I would have been in a lot more trouble. I try not to think about what would have happened if we had gone to New Zealand as planned.
All joking aside please take this advice, it might just save your life.
Sunday 17 March 2013
Energy drain
Sunday 17th March
First of all thank you to Mandy for writing the blog yesterday, excellently done as always.
Today has been a struggle. As soon as you start to get used to having a bit more energy you are always going to get a day when you get knocked back, and today is perhaps that day.
It's not been too bad but I really struggled to wake up this morning. When I finally dragged myself out of my pit I went for a walk around the river. I was thinking of running today but as Mandy put in the blog yesterday she is not keen on me starting too soon so I deferred to her for today ( but probably not for long! ).
For lunch we went to Mandy's mum, nice piece of lamb there. Then home for the daily injection and off to bed. Unfortunately today although I slept for quite a while again I struggled to wake up and now feel rubbish. A headache and lack of appetite together with being very tired is making Tim one miserable bugger. I think an early night is in order as I am at work tomorrow.
As Mandy put yesterday it is strange what has become normal. I want to start weaning myself off the afternoon sleep, but a day like today makes me wonder how long before I can. It's only 4 weeks until I have to be back at work full time. Perhaps I just need as much sleep as possible to store it up between now and then!
Cheers
Tim
First of all thank you to Mandy for writing the blog yesterday, excellently done as always.
Today has been a struggle. As soon as you start to get used to having a bit more energy you are always going to get a day when you get knocked back, and today is perhaps that day.
It's not been too bad but I really struggled to wake up this morning. When I finally dragged myself out of my pit I went for a walk around the river. I was thinking of running today but as Mandy put in the blog yesterday she is not keen on me starting too soon so I deferred to her for today ( but probably not for long! ).
For lunch we went to Mandy's mum, nice piece of lamb there. Then home for the daily injection and off to bed. Unfortunately today although I slept for quite a while again I struggled to wake up and now feel rubbish. A headache and lack of appetite together with being very tired is making Tim one miserable bugger. I think an early night is in order as I am at work tomorrow.
As Mandy put yesterday it is strange what has become normal. I want to start weaning myself off the afternoon sleep, but a day like today makes me wonder how long before I can. It's only 4 weeks until I have to be back at work full time. Perhaps I just need as much sleep as possible to store it up between now and then!
Cheers
Tim
Saturday 16 March 2013
Normality
Saturday 16th March
Fed up with only writing this when Tim is too tired or ill to do it himself, I offered to do it today so I could write something positive. We have actually been out together....and not to the hospital!
We have come to the time of year again when I help my Mum out on the caravan site on a Saturday morning, it being mostly change over day for them. Tim had had a word with Mum unbeknown to me and I was free for the morning. We went out to Craycombe Café for breakfast which was a treat then on to Worcester for an amble round the shops. I can't remember the last time we did this, certainly not this year. We didn't stay too long as we didn't want him to over do it and anyway I had a fitting at 3 and we had to get back for the nurse calling as there is no surgery open today. It was nice though and felt normal.
Strange how things become normal, without you thinking about it. One of my friends popped over and she asked me how things were, I replied fine as they are at the moment. We are settling into that between major stresses period where we have done the really awful spell and are just cruising gently towards the next big stress of the scan. Those last few weeks of February that were just so horrid are done and we have picked ourselves up and got on with it again. Having Tim around so much of the time has become normal. He is good and doesn't disturb me when I'm working but I was used to be on my own during the day till Ben came home. Him going to the doctors or the District Nurse coming to do his injection every day has become normal, as has him needing a sleep every afternoon. All these things will gradually change, I know, like the fact that he is going into work at least a couple of times in the week now. Hopefully normal will become soon like normal used to be, but with the team that is us just being that bit stronger.
Tim is desperate to start running again now which I can understand but I'm trying to hold him back from starting too soon. He does as the saying goes needs to not "run before he can walk"! I understand his frustration as I haven't run now since September due to a damaged tendon in my foot. I don't share the passion for running that he does but I can't do any high impact exercise at all and that is driving me mad. I know that I can't stop him for much longer but I do want him to carry on upping his walking at least for another week so that when the running shoes go back on he doesn't come back too deflated because he couldn't make it to the end of the road. He is aware that Tewkesbury is coming up, I know, but he just needs to take it easy.
Ben is on his way home now from London. Communication from him has been scant but I think he has enjoyed it. He will be very tired tomorrow and if anyone wants the stroppy teenager that he will become by evening they are welcome to him!! I anticipate a few hinges of doors will be tested before the day is done.
All in all though a nice day, with Tim feeling more himself. I can see the improvement over the last 2 weeks, even though it is gradual. I just want it to be the end of April now so we know where we stand for sure and can get on with positive things like booking a holiday!
Mandy
Fed up with only writing this when Tim is too tired or ill to do it himself, I offered to do it today so I could write something positive. We have actually been out together....and not to the hospital!
We have come to the time of year again when I help my Mum out on the caravan site on a Saturday morning, it being mostly change over day for them. Tim had had a word with Mum unbeknown to me and I was free for the morning. We went out to Craycombe Café for breakfast which was a treat then on to Worcester for an amble round the shops. I can't remember the last time we did this, certainly not this year. We didn't stay too long as we didn't want him to over do it and anyway I had a fitting at 3 and we had to get back for the nurse calling as there is no surgery open today. It was nice though and felt normal.
Strange how things become normal, without you thinking about it. One of my friends popped over and she asked me how things were, I replied fine as they are at the moment. We are settling into that between major stresses period where we have done the really awful spell and are just cruising gently towards the next big stress of the scan. Those last few weeks of February that were just so horrid are done and we have picked ourselves up and got on with it again. Having Tim around so much of the time has become normal. He is good and doesn't disturb me when I'm working but I was used to be on my own during the day till Ben came home. Him going to the doctors or the District Nurse coming to do his injection every day has become normal, as has him needing a sleep every afternoon. All these things will gradually change, I know, like the fact that he is going into work at least a couple of times in the week now. Hopefully normal will become soon like normal used to be, but with the team that is us just being that bit stronger.
Tim is desperate to start running again now which I can understand but I'm trying to hold him back from starting too soon. He does as the saying goes needs to not "run before he can walk"! I understand his frustration as I haven't run now since September due to a damaged tendon in my foot. I don't share the passion for running that he does but I can't do any high impact exercise at all and that is driving me mad. I know that I can't stop him for much longer but I do want him to carry on upping his walking at least for another week so that when the running shoes go back on he doesn't come back too deflated because he couldn't make it to the end of the road. He is aware that Tewkesbury is coming up, I know, but he just needs to take it easy.
Ben is on his way home now from London. Communication from him has been scant but I think he has enjoyed it. He will be very tired tomorrow and if anyone wants the stroppy teenager that he will become by evening they are welcome to him!! I anticipate a few hinges of doors will be tested before the day is done.
All in all though a nice day, with Tim feeling more himself. I can see the improvement over the last 2 weeks, even though it is gradual. I just want it to be the end of April now so we know where we stand for sure and can get on with positive things like booking a holiday!
Mandy
Friday 15 March 2013
Macmillan meeting
Friday 15th March
I met with the people from Macmillan fund raising today. There are two things that I/we are doing to raise money for them.
Firstly, as you should know if you have been reading this blog since the beginning, is that I am going to do the Tewkesbury Half marathon on the 19th of May. I will be asking for sponsorship so beware if you see me with a piece of paper in my hand!
Secondly the Evesham 10K is raising money for Macmillan as it's main charity this year, the other being a donation to the Bell Tower restoration fund. Most of the money raised will be just from the 10K entries but if you intend to run it and want to get sponsorship please see me for details.
Apart from that the rest of the day has been very quiet (again!). Had a good long sleep this afternoon. Both Mandy and I are very tired today due to Ben having to be up at 4.30 this morning for his school trip to London for the robotics competition. I have to admit that Mandy got up and I stayed in bed but it still made for a very disturbed night.
Going to make the most of Ben not being here tomorrow. I have persuaded Mandy to have a day off work and we can spend some time together.
At last I am starting to feel a little like my old self with a bit of energy. I hope I am not saying this too soon.
Cheers
Tim
I met with the people from Macmillan fund raising today. There are two things that I/we are doing to raise money for them.
Firstly, as you should know if you have been reading this blog since the beginning, is that I am going to do the Tewkesbury Half marathon on the 19th of May. I will be asking for sponsorship so beware if you see me with a piece of paper in my hand!
Secondly the Evesham 10K is raising money for Macmillan as it's main charity this year, the other being a donation to the Bell Tower restoration fund. Most of the money raised will be just from the 10K entries but if you intend to run it and want to get sponsorship please see me for details.
Apart from that the rest of the day has been very quiet (again!). Had a good long sleep this afternoon. Both Mandy and I are very tired today due to Ben having to be up at 4.30 this morning for his school trip to London for the robotics competition. I have to admit that Mandy got up and I stayed in bed but it still made for a very disturbed night.
Going to make the most of Ben not being here tomorrow. I have persuaded Mandy to have a day off work and we can spend some time together.
At last I am starting to feel a little like my old self with a bit of energy. I hope I am not saying this too soon.
Cheers
Tim
Thursday 14 March 2013
Broadway Tower
Thursday 14th March
A quiet day as planned.
I did however get my trail running shoes out and go for an 'off road' walk up by Broadway Tower this morning. OK for the first part as it was downhill ( obviously ) but back up to the tower was hard work. Very warm in the sunshine though. I still think the views from up there are some of the best in the country. It reminds me of why I run and why I can't wait to get going again. Got the shoes very muddy, and the trousers too if truth be told, thanks to the farmer who drives his tractor up and down one of the fields along the path route churning it to a mudfest.
Spent most of the afternoon asleep, I need lots the day after being at work. Then off for another injection.
That's all really for today.
Cheers
Tim
A quiet day as planned.
I did however get my trail running shoes out and go for an 'off road' walk up by Broadway Tower this morning. OK for the first part as it was downhill ( obviously ) but back up to the tower was hard work. Very warm in the sunshine though. I still think the views from up there are some of the best in the country. It reminds me of why I run and why I can't wait to get going again. Got the shoes very muddy, and the trousers too if truth be told, thanks to the farmer who drives his tractor up and down one of the fields along the path route churning it to a mudfest.
Spent most of the afternoon asleep, I need lots the day after being at work. Then off for another injection.
That's all really for today.
Cheers
Tim
Wednesday 13 March 2013
Longer working hours
Wednesday 13th March
Off to work again today. After a slow start to the year it is now really busy so it is great to be back and part of it. I managed to stay a little longer today so although I will be very tired tomorrow I feel I can stretch the working time a bit more. I still have to be careful I know but whilst I feel I can and am enjoying it I will give it more time.
The rest of the day didn't amount to much. I tried to have a sleep this afternoon but although I lay in bed with my eyes closed actual sleep would not come. A quick trip to the doctor's for my injection and the obligatory trip to Tesco and the day is pretty much done.
I am starting to feel a little frustrated at the tiredness not abating at all. This is me not being reasonable as I know really that it could last for a long time and it is only about 10 days since I finished chemo, but I am impatient to get back to normal. I am fed up with evenings spent just trying to stay awake when it is the only quality time I get to spend with Mandy. Roll on the weekend and hope that Mandy dosen't have to work both days again.
Ben is away Friday and Saturday taking part in the final of a national robotics competition at Excell in London. He and nine friends have built a robot at school and got through to the final after a qualifying competition in Birmingham.
Planning a very quiet day tomorrow.
Cheers
Tim
Off to work again today. After a slow start to the year it is now really busy so it is great to be back and part of it. I managed to stay a little longer today so although I will be very tired tomorrow I feel I can stretch the working time a bit more. I still have to be careful I know but whilst I feel I can and am enjoying it I will give it more time.
The rest of the day didn't amount to much. I tried to have a sleep this afternoon but although I lay in bed with my eyes closed actual sleep would not come. A quick trip to the doctor's for my injection and the obligatory trip to Tesco and the day is pretty much done.
I am starting to feel a little frustrated at the tiredness not abating at all. This is me not being reasonable as I know really that it could last for a long time and it is only about 10 days since I finished chemo, but I am impatient to get back to normal. I am fed up with evenings spent just trying to stay awake when it is the only quality time I get to spend with Mandy. Roll on the weekend and hope that Mandy dosen't have to work both days again.
Ben is away Friday and Saturday taking part in the final of a national robotics competition at Excell in London. He and nine friends have built a robot at school and got through to the final after a qualifying competition in Birmingham.
Planning a very quiet day tomorrow.
Cheers
Tim
Tuesday 12 March 2013
Walking
Tuesday 12th March
A quiet day as planned. I had a nice long walk though, around 4 miles today in lovely sunshine although it was bitterly cold. I needed to make the walks a bit longer before I start to run again.
I met Mandy on my way home to go to the post office to pick up a signed for cheque from our insurance company for the holiday to New Zealand that we had to cancel. A lesson learnt here, read the small print. We had not noticed that there was a maximum payout for cancellation of £1250 each person so we lost over a thousand pounds and nothing we can do about it.
I had a good long sleep this afternoon but perhaps a little too long as I have struggled to get going again since.
Going to watch Barcelona v AC Milan now. Stunning opening goal by Messi, just like watching Forest !
Cheers
Tim
A quiet day as planned. I had a nice long walk though, around 4 miles today in lovely sunshine although it was bitterly cold. I needed to make the walks a bit longer before I start to run again.
I met Mandy on my way home to go to the post office to pick up a signed for cheque from our insurance company for the holiday to New Zealand that we had to cancel. A lesson learnt here, read the small print. We had not noticed that there was a maximum payout for cancellation of £1250 each person so we lost over a thousand pounds and nothing we can do about it.
I had a good long sleep this afternoon but perhaps a little too long as I have struggled to get going again since.
Going to watch Barcelona v AC Milan now. Stunning opening goal by Messi, just like watching Forest !
Cheers
Tim
Monday 11 March 2013
Scan date
Monday 11th March
The days seem to be passing quickly at the moment. I went to work today but it still takes a while for me to get going in a morning, so including the half hour drive to get there I did not start until 9.45. I worked till about 12.45 and then had to come home via the supermarket ( Sainsburys not Tesco, I felt like a traitor! ) and Curtainwise in Stratford to pick up some stuff for Mandy. So by the time I got home it was 2.15. A quick cup of tea and off to bed for a needed snooze. Then down to the health centre for 5pm, my new destination for injections instead of at home, and suddenly the day is nearly done.
Working still makes me very tired. Although the effects of the chemo will last for about 6-7 weeks after the last shot, the tiredness can go on for months so I need to get used to it.
I have had the date for my scan come through for the 15th of April. Despite requesting it to be at Coventry and not at Rugby it of course came through as Rugby. Fortunately this afternoon I managed to get it re-arranged for Cov. For some reason the threat of going to have it done privately seems to scare them into doing what you want. Why they can't just do it in the first place I do not know.
So it is scan on the 15th and results on the 25th, so six and a half weeks to wait. I think the time to the scan may race by but the wait for the results might seem like forever.
It is also only 10 weeks to the Tewkesbury Half marathon. This is a scary thought. On the other hand I am not going to rush into training as I will do more damage than good in the long term. And there is no point in getting over the illness in time only to be injured!
Sleep is calling now so I will sign off for today.
Cheers
Tim
The days seem to be passing quickly at the moment. I went to work today but it still takes a while for me to get going in a morning, so including the half hour drive to get there I did not start until 9.45. I worked till about 12.45 and then had to come home via the supermarket ( Sainsburys not Tesco, I felt like a traitor! ) and Curtainwise in Stratford to pick up some stuff for Mandy. So by the time I got home it was 2.15. A quick cup of tea and off to bed for a needed snooze. Then down to the health centre for 5pm, my new destination for injections instead of at home, and suddenly the day is nearly done.
Working still makes me very tired. Although the effects of the chemo will last for about 6-7 weeks after the last shot, the tiredness can go on for months so I need to get used to it.
I have had the date for my scan come through for the 15th of April. Despite requesting it to be at Coventry and not at Rugby it of course came through as Rugby. Fortunately this afternoon I managed to get it re-arranged for Cov. For some reason the threat of going to have it done privately seems to scare them into doing what you want. Why they can't just do it in the first place I do not know.
So it is scan on the 15th and results on the 25th, so six and a half weeks to wait. I think the time to the scan may race by but the wait for the results might seem like forever.
It is also only 10 weeks to the Tewkesbury Half marathon. This is a scary thought. On the other hand I am not going to rush into training as I will do more damage than good in the long term. And there is no point in getting over the illness in time only to be injured!
Sleep is calling now so I will sign off for today.
Cheers
Tim
Sunday 10 March 2013
3 month anniversary
Sunday 10th March
Today is the 3 month anniversary of my operation to remove the initial cancer lump. I can't really believe how life has changed since that. At the moment everything seems different, I definitely have a different outlook on life. Some things that seemed important and worth worrying about now seem trivial. Mandy only said this morning that she was trying to convince herself that she should not worry so much about work, however this is easier said than done in the wedding dress business as a deadline is definitely a deadline with no room for manoeuvre!
I am determined however to get less stressed about the small things in life anymore. Life really can be too short and it is just not worth it. Get out there and just do it if you want to, make it happen and don't wait for life to come to you.
On a lighter note about my operation there was the following exchange on Facebook a couple of weeks ago between a couple of fellow skittlers who play for other teams. Quick background to this story. As long as you have been following this blog from the start you will know which particular part of my anatomy I had removed. And I have been playing skittles for 26 years now and by my own admission am not bad at it and don't mind telling people so ( I know that's hard to believe! ). First friend upon hearing I was near to being able to play again quipped 'maybe now he is lop sided it will make him a worse bowler'. To which second friend replied 'don't worry his ego will balance him up!'. Needless to say on my first game back I had the highest score of the game ( told you I was not shy about bragging ).
I did go out to watch the runners finish in the Blackminster half marathon this morning. I have to say it was bloody cold but nice to talk to my running friends as it always is. I still get surprised by how many people are reading this. I was talking to a friend called Ade who I had not seen for about 6 months who did not even know about my illness, however he was with another guy who I did not know who when I told Ade what was wrong said 'you must be the guy with the blog. I've been following you on it. Very pleased to meet you'.
I find it quite strange to keep getting complimented on the blog. I have never written anything like this before and don't consider myself any good at it but people genuinely seem to enjoy it. Maybe enjoy is the wrong word, perhaps appreciate instead. At times I find it quite difficult to write but it has helped me no end so please keep reading and comment if you can ( I gather it can be difficult to do or you need a google account or something ).
Cheers for now.
Tim
Today is the 3 month anniversary of my operation to remove the initial cancer lump. I can't really believe how life has changed since that. At the moment everything seems different, I definitely have a different outlook on life. Some things that seemed important and worth worrying about now seem trivial. Mandy only said this morning that she was trying to convince herself that she should not worry so much about work, however this is easier said than done in the wedding dress business as a deadline is definitely a deadline with no room for manoeuvre!
I am determined however to get less stressed about the small things in life anymore. Life really can be too short and it is just not worth it. Get out there and just do it if you want to, make it happen and don't wait for life to come to you.
On a lighter note about my operation there was the following exchange on Facebook a couple of weeks ago between a couple of fellow skittlers who play for other teams. Quick background to this story. As long as you have been following this blog from the start you will know which particular part of my anatomy I had removed. And I have been playing skittles for 26 years now and by my own admission am not bad at it and don't mind telling people so ( I know that's hard to believe! ). First friend upon hearing I was near to being able to play again quipped 'maybe now he is lop sided it will make him a worse bowler'. To which second friend replied 'don't worry his ego will balance him up!'. Needless to say on my first game back I had the highest score of the game ( told you I was not shy about bragging ).
I did go out to watch the runners finish in the Blackminster half marathon this morning. I have to say it was bloody cold but nice to talk to my running friends as it always is. I still get surprised by how many people are reading this. I was talking to a friend called Ade who I had not seen for about 6 months who did not even know about my illness, however he was with another guy who I did not know who when I told Ade what was wrong said 'you must be the guy with the blog. I've been following you on it. Very pleased to meet you'.
I find it quite strange to keep getting complimented on the blog. I have never written anything like this before and don't consider myself any good at it but people genuinely seem to enjoy it. Maybe enjoy is the wrong word, perhaps appreciate instead. At times I find it quite difficult to write but it has helped me no end so please keep reading and comment if you can ( I gather it can be difficult to do or you need a google account or something ).
Cheers for now.
Tim
Saturday 9 March 2013
Return of sickness
Saturday 9th March
I don't know if it is because I have stopped my anti sickness tablets too soon but I had a return to being sick ( twice ) this morning. First as soon as I got out of bed and again about half an hour later. The rest of the day has been OK but I have resumed the medication for now. I'm still very tired even after a decent sleep this afternoon. I will just have to watch how much I am doing.
Not much else to tell about today. Having had such a bad start just needed to relax from then on.
Cheered up by the footy results this afternoon though, five wins in a row for Forest now.
Today is also the 3 month anniversary of the last time I did any serious exercise. A 9.5 mile run with Stuart from his house in Badsey. In some ways it seems an age ago, on the other hand I can't believe how fast it has gone. In my mind I am ready to start running again but the body is just not there yet. It is going to be a long haul back to any kind of fitness at all.
Going to try to go and watch some friends running the Blackminster Half tomorrow but it is weather dependant ( yes I am a lightweight ) and tiredness permitting.
Cheers
Tim
I don't know if it is because I have stopped my anti sickness tablets too soon but I had a return to being sick ( twice ) this morning. First as soon as I got out of bed and again about half an hour later. The rest of the day has been OK but I have resumed the medication for now. I'm still very tired even after a decent sleep this afternoon. I will just have to watch how much I am doing.
Not much else to tell about today. Having had such a bad start just needed to relax from then on.
Cheered up by the footy results this afternoon though, five wins in a row for Forest now.
Today is also the 3 month anniversary of the last time I did any serious exercise. A 9.5 mile run with Stuart from his house in Badsey. In some ways it seems an age ago, on the other hand I can't believe how fast it has gone. In my mind I am ready to start running again but the body is just not there yet. It is going to be a long haul back to any kind of fitness at all.
Going to try to go and watch some friends running the Blackminster Half tomorrow but it is weather dependant ( yes I am a lightweight ) and tiredness permitting.
Cheers
Tim
Friday 8 March 2013
Better but still tired
Friday 8th March
Not as quiet a day as I had hoped for today. We actually went and made new Wills today as neither of us can remember where our last ones were. Ben has had to be nice to us for a few days to make sure he got his inheritance!!
Also Mandy's dad and Ruth came to visit for tea. We have not seen much of them during my treatment as they have both had colds. I did get very tired though whilst they were here. I think that yesterday has caught up with me big time so this is going to be a short post tonight.
Up until this evening I have felt pretty good again today. My sister rang earlier and she said that I sounded much more like myself than I have done for quite some time. She said that I had sounded flat before even when I had positive things to say.
That's it for tonight I'm afraid, I need my beauty sleep.
Cheers
Tim
Not as quiet a day as I had hoped for today. We actually went and made new Wills today as neither of us can remember where our last ones were. Ben has had to be nice to us for a few days to make sure he got his inheritance!!
Also Mandy's dad and Ruth came to visit for tea. We have not seen much of them during my treatment as they have both had colds. I did get very tired though whilst they were here. I think that yesterday has caught up with me big time so this is going to be a short post tonight.
Up until this evening I have felt pretty good again today. My sister rang earlier and she said that I sounded much more like myself than I have done for quite some time. She said that I had sounded flat before even when I had positive things to say.
That's it for tonight I'm afraid, I need my beauty sleep.
Cheers
Tim
Thursday 7 March 2013
Work
Thursday 7th March
I've been to work again today. That's twice this week, I'd better watch out or it might become a habit! In all seriousness though it does me the power of good to be there. Maybe not physically as I am now tired out, but mentally it is great to be thinking about other things and be a bit stretched instead of just vegetating at home.
Managed a short sleep after my injection this afternoon which it turns out I need as I had a phone call from my skittles team saying they were short of players so can I go. I'm too tired really but don't want to let them down so will play as long as the opposition don't mind me bowling off early and leaving. I really can't cope with a 10.30 finish, I would fall asleep in the club.
Hopefully a nice quiet day tomorrow to catch up some sleep.
Cheers
Tim
I've been to work again today. That's twice this week, I'd better watch out or it might become a habit! In all seriousness though it does me the power of good to be there. Maybe not physically as I am now tired out, but mentally it is great to be thinking about other things and be a bit stretched instead of just vegetating at home.
Managed a short sleep after my injection this afternoon which it turns out I need as I had a phone call from my skittles team saying they were short of players so can I go. I'm too tired really but don't want to let them down so will play as long as the opposition don't mind me bowling off early and leaving. I really can't cope with a 10.30 finish, I would fall asleep in the club.
Hopefully a nice quiet day tomorrow to catch up some sleep.
Cheers
Tim
Wednesday 6 March 2013
Sleeping off a migraine
Wednesday 6th March
Woke up this morning at 7.30 feeling very sick with a migraine raging round my head. Managed to take a migraine tablet and an anti sickness pill and go back to sleep. Woke again at 9 with partial success as the sickness had gone but my head still felt like it had someone using a hammer inside it. More sleep required until 10.30 and eventually managed to crawl out of bed at 11, but felt much better. I'm glad these headaches seem to have slowed down in their frequency of late but they do tend to come in clusters so I will have to be on my guard for the next few days.
Following that I have had a very quiet day just watching some TV and resting.
The need to run is getting stronger but I am determined to resist for a bit longer. I need to really get more rest and more of the chemo out of my system. It takes about a week to stop excreting ( horrid word ) it from your body, but it will carry on working for another 5 or 6 weeks. Yesterday after work as it was a nice day I drove home via the scenic route but this did take me past a lot of the routes I run on when I am training. The canal near Wootten Wawen and the woods around Alcester particularly. Can't wait for the Summer to hit the trails again. I did go through a spell when I was down that I thought I would not want or be able to run again, but that has passed now. I think I will not race much this year though, I'm just going to concentrate on enjoying it with no pressure. God knows I can do without pressure for a while!
Cheers for now.
Tim
Woke up this morning at 7.30 feeling very sick with a migraine raging round my head. Managed to take a migraine tablet and an anti sickness pill and go back to sleep. Woke again at 9 with partial success as the sickness had gone but my head still felt like it had someone using a hammer inside it. More sleep required until 10.30 and eventually managed to crawl out of bed at 11, but felt much better. I'm glad these headaches seem to have slowed down in their frequency of late but they do tend to come in clusters so I will have to be on my guard for the next few days.
Following that I have had a very quiet day just watching some TV and resting.
The need to run is getting stronger but I am determined to resist for a bit longer. I need to really get more rest and more of the chemo out of my system. It takes about a week to stop excreting ( horrid word ) it from your body, but it will carry on working for another 5 or 6 weeks. Yesterday after work as it was a nice day I drove home via the scenic route but this did take me past a lot of the routes I run on when I am training. The canal near Wootten Wawen and the woods around Alcester particularly. Can't wait for the Summer to hit the trails again. I did go through a spell when I was down that I thought I would not want or be able to run again, but that has passed now. I think I will not race much this year though, I'm just going to concentrate on enjoying it with no pressure. God knows I can do without pressure for a while!
Cheers for now.
Tim
Tuesday 5 March 2013
Confidence
Tuesday 5th March
One thing that has surprised me a bit about the last couple of months is the effect it has had on my confidence. Not in my confidence of dealing and talking with people, most of you know that talking is not something I have a problem with especially if it is a good gossip!! But in my confidence to go places on my own. I have got used to Mandy being with me, hand holding as it were, and usually to drive. So today was a good day as I went to work this morning. Not for too long, just about 3 hours, but it did allow me to start to get back into the swing of normal life. I have missed so much work that catching up on everything that is going on will take some time but at least I have started, and it so far hasn't left me too tired. Although I might regret saying that later tonight.
The rest of the day was pretty standard, just my injection as usual ( incidentally Ben has his jab at school so only Mandy escaped the needles today! ), and an attempt at sleep although not very successful.
Mandy spoke to a friend of hers today who has been following the blog who mentioned that she wondered if something was wrong when I did not post on Sunday. This may happen occasionally now if there is nothing much to say so don't worry. Mandy is likely to post if there is a problem.
It has also been noted that I have not mentioned Ben very much. I have found it quite awkward to say much. He is a teenager and although he is very loving and caring he is still a teenager who keeps himself to himself at times and maybe finds it difficult to express himself. I also do not want to embarrass him. However he has said that he will do a post one day soon which will be interesting.
I have to go and make tea for Ben and I now as Mandy is out teaching at college tonight so that's it for today.
Cheers
Tim
One thing that has surprised me a bit about the last couple of months is the effect it has had on my confidence. Not in my confidence of dealing and talking with people, most of you know that talking is not something I have a problem with especially if it is a good gossip!! But in my confidence to go places on my own. I have got used to Mandy being with me, hand holding as it were, and usually to drive. So today was a good day as I went to work this morning. Not for too long, just about 3 hours, but it did allow me to start to get back into the swing of normal life. I have missed so much work that catching up on everything that is going on will take some time but at least I have started, and it so far hasn't left me too tired. Although I might regret saying that later tonight.
The rest of the day was pretty standard, just my injection as usual ( incidentally Ben has his jab at school so only Mandy escaped the needles today! ), and an attempt at sleep although not very successful.
Mandy spoke to a friend of hers today who has been following the blog who mentioned that she wondered if something was wrong when I did not post on Sunday. This may happen occasionally now if there is nothing much to say so don't worry. Mandy is likely to post if there is a problem.
It has also been noted that I have not mentioned Ben very much. I have found it quite awkward to say much. He is a teenager and although he is very loving and caring he is still a teenager who keeps himself to himself at times and maybe finds it difficult to express himself. I also do not want to embarrass him. However he has said that he will do a post one day soon which will be interesting.
I have to go and make tea for Ben and I now as Mandy is out teaching at college tonight so that's it for today.
Cheers
Tim
Monday 4 March 2013
Sunday 3rd / Monday 4th March
So two days of news in one blog. Good news really as it means nothing dramatic enough has happened to be worth writing about.
Sunday was pretty standard. Nice walk by the river at Twyford with Ben in the morning. I only managed a very short sleep after lunch as the district nurse arrived early for my injection. This left me tired later when we went to Mandy's mum's for tea which was a shame as I could not enjoy it properly.
Today has been quite good. Lovely weather for a walk into town and round the river, the first time I have been for a walk this year without a coat. Also managed to fix the oven door. It makes a change for me to actually achieve something useful. Then a good sleep after the nurse's visit to hopefully set me up for a decent evening. We shall see.
I'm hoping to go to work tomorrow morning for a few hours and see how that goes. As long as I time it right for a sleep later it should be fine.
The tiredness is still really hard to explain. It is just total exhaustion of both mind and body. Any decisions have to be made early in the day or I just can't concentrate enough!
Having said that I've had enough of this now for today!!
Cheers
Tim
So two days of news in one blog. Good news really as it means nothing dramatic enough has happened to be worth writing about.
Sunday was pretty standard. Nice walk by the river at Twyford with Ben in the morning. I only managed a very short sleep after lunch as the district nurse arrived early for my injection. This left me tired later when we went to Mandy's mum's for tea which was a shame as I could not enjoy it properly.
Today has been quite good. Lovely weather for a walk into town and round the river, the first time I have been for a walk this year without a coat. Also managed to fix the oven door. It makes a change for me to actually achieve something useful. Then a good sleep after the nurse's visit to hopefully set me up for a decent evening. We shall see.
I'm hoping to go to work tomorrow morning for a few hours and see how that goes. As long as I time it right for a sleep later it should be fine.
The tiredness is still really hard to explain. It is just total exhaustion of both mind and body. Any decisions have to be made early in the day or I just can't concentrate enough!
Having said that I've had enough of this now for today!!
Cheers
Tim
Saturday 2 March 2013
Post chemo day one
Saturday 2nd March
The first day of freedom from the threat of chemo and I feel so much better than yesterday. No sickness today ( yet ! ) and a bit more energy. I'm probably running on adrenaline from the relief at the moment but hey, who cares.
Still going to be quiet days for a while though. Just watched tele this morning, trip to Tesco after lunch, then injection time, a quick walk with Mandy and then some friends over for a cup of tea and cake. A lemon cake that I actually could taste and enjoyed. I still don't want sweet cake and chocolate still tastes disgusting but that will change in time I'm sure.
Not much else to tell really. My mind is starting to turn to things fitness wise, although I will not attempt running for at least a couple of weeks. Just some static exercises that won't tire me too much until then. As usual with me I will start tomorrow!!
Cheers
Tim
The first day of freedom from the threat of chemo and I feel so much better than yesterday. No sickness today ( yet ! ) and a bit more energy. I'm probably running on adrenaline from the relief at the moment but hey, who cares.
Still going to be quiet days for a while though. Just watched tele this morning, trip to Tesco after lunch, then injection time, a quick walk with Mandy and then some friends over for a cup of tea and cake. A lemon cake that I actually could taste and enjoyed. I still don't want sweet cake and chocolate still tastes disgusting but that will change in time I'm sure.
Not much else to tell really. My mind is starting to turn to things fitness wise, although I will not attempt running for at least a couple of weeks. Just some static exercises that won't tire me too much until then. As usual with me I will start tomorrow!!
Cheers
Tim
Friday 1 March 2013
Chemo finished
Friday 1st March
At times, including this morning ( I will explain ), I never thought today would come. I have finally done my very last session of chemo. No more vile drugs to be pumped into me. I just need to rest and get some sort of normality back.
As usual I didn't make today easy. I woke up feeling OK but as soon as I got up the sickness started. I basically then threw up every 45 minutes or so for the rest of the morning, and in the car on the way to hospital and finally on arrival in a hospital loo. I am sure this is all caused by the stressed state I get myself into as it seems to have abated now I am home. I even managed a small slice of pizza tonight. Pizza perhaps not the best choice but hey ho. I have not been this sick since the night before Ben's 3rd birthday party but that was self inflicted !! One of my readers in particular will remember it perhaps a little too well. Lets put it this way, I have not drunk to excess ever since.
So just a small celebration of passing another step. It has to be tempered by the reality that although the first time success rate for this treatment of my cancer is very good, it is not a guarantee. It may have destroyed the tumour completely. Or it may have killed it but left a small lump of gristle that has to be removed by surgery. Anything else I cannot contemplate and has not been discussed.
So here is to the next few weeks. Slowly getting a proper appetite back with working tastebuds. Having some sort of normal family life particularly with Ben. Treat Mandy and have some quality time together ( maybe without me having my head down a toilet! ). And to get back to work who have been incredibly supportive throughout.
Need to relax now so see you tomorrow.
Cheers
Tim
At times, including this morning ( I will explain ), I never thought today would come. I have finally done my very last session of chemo. No more vile drugs to be pumped into me. I just need to rest and get some sort of normality back.
As usual I didn't make today easy. I woke up feeling OK but as soon as I got up the sickness started. I basically then threw up every 45 minutes or so for the rest of the morning, and in the car on the way to hospital and finally on arrival in a hospital loo. I am sure this is all caused by the stressed state I get myself into as it seems to have abated now I am home. I even managed a small slice of pizza tonight. Pizza perhaps not the best choice but hey ho. I have not been this sick since the night before Ben's 3rd birthday party but that was self inflicted !! One of my readers in particular will remember it perhaps a little too well. Lets put it this way, I have not drunk to excess ever since.
So just a small celebration of passing another step. It has to be tempered by the reality that although the first time success rate for this treatment of my cancer is very good, it is not a guarantee. It may have destroyed the tumour completely. Or it may have killed it but left a small lump of gristle that has to be removed by surgery. Anything else I cannot contemplate and has not been discussed.
So here is to the next few weeks. Slowly getting a proper appetite back with working tastebuds. Having some sort of normal family life particularly with Ben. Treat Mandy and have some quality time together ( maybe without me having my head down a toilet! ). And to get back to work who have been incredibly supportive throughout.
Need to relax now so see you tomorrow.
Cheers
Tim
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