Monday 20th May
So this is my final post, Tim will rightly have the last word tomorrow.
Firstly to yesterday, a day and a race that Tim had throughout his treatment set his sights on getting to the finish line of. He had done so well with his training, picking his speeds and distances up far quicker than I thought he would...or should at times! Determination and competitiveness is deep within him though so I don't know why I was surprised. Outwardly yesterday morning he was very calm, more so than normal before a race. He seemed totally focused on that finish line and nothing was getting in his way. When we arrived he soon found other Evesham runners and Kurt his running mate so Ben and I set off to get as far round the course as possible to wave him on. We had procured a banner from ebay with 'Run Tim Run' printed on it which we could hold up to encourage him further. We managed to walk to the 2 mile marker but after all we could do was wait for him again at the end, trusting him to Kurt.
We waited at the finish knowing he would be around the 2 hour mark, and watched other Evesham runners come in. Not long before he was due an ambulance went off lights flashing and I must admit I did say to Ben 'they better not be going to scrape your Dad up into that!' Not long after though we saw him come into view, looking OK with legs still capable of movement. I was very pleased to see him cross that line.
I have to admit yesterday was a very difficult day for me. Going to the race I felt as nervous as if I was running it myself. I did have a word with Kurt before the start asking him to slow Tim down and generally look after him. He did both and I'm very grateful to him for that. Even after he had finished though when I knew he was round and OK, I struggled with the emotion of it all. Also today I could be tearful if pushed, just sheer relief I think.
Time really has gone quickly but there were points when I thought things couldn't get any worse. They could of course have been much worse and in reality we have been lucky, we got the outcome we were promised. If this experience has taught us nothing else its that there is always someone in a more difficult place than you. Through the process we have touched lives with plenty of others who could expect very different results from Tim's.
And so, as in all good writings, I need a conclusion, the highs and the lows. Lets start with the latter first as there were plenty of them. I will never forget sitting in either of the consultant's rooms, both the initial surgeon's and later the oncologist's and listening in disbelief to what they had to say. Then crying all the way home, trying to still drive safely. That happened too after leaving Tim in A&E, one of the very lowest points of the whole experience. The worst thing of all though was watching my lovely fit husband go through something that made him so ill, and having to try and convince myself that they did know what they were doing and to trust them.
Finding highs is harder, there are only two. I will never forget the support we have received from all those around us. Some I would hope to be able to call on in times of crisis and they have all stepped up to the plate and beyond. There have been others though that I personally didn't really know before who have sent regular messages of support to us both. And the second obvious high is that we were right to trust them at the hospital, they did know their stuff and I have got my man back, not quite in one piece (!) but near enough.
Ben has been fantastic despite being a teenager.
Thank you all and I leave Tim to finish.
Mandy
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